We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
