hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
This is the prime rib incident all over again
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
