Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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