Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
