Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
