he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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