dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
We are all done wearing pants today
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
