If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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