i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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