i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Randomize
