apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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