Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize
