I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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