States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
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