Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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