she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize