Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Randomize