so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
