Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
