girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
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