sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I just want nice things and good sex
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize