she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
