Barsexuality is the new black.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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