Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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