They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
