Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
