Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
