If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
