At least make sure they are 18
Why
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
