so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Randomize
