Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
