i wish there were pregnant emoticons
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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