I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
