He is an equal opportunity slut.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
