Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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