Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
