Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Randomize
