The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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