dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
You took a bar mat shot.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
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