I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
Randomize