there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
