i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
