I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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