Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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