Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize