I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
