I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
