so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize