You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
