If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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