I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
