he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Randomize
