You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Randomize
