What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
